if there is any justice in the world, the yankees will get knocked out today and we can all get on with our lives.

that aside, speechwriters llc has successfully completed yet another marathon drive and are presently gearing up for our first show with the alternate routes in chicago. i love chicago and wish the white sox the best of luck and it must be said that il duque is a fuck-off amazing pitcher, but chicago needs to get its act together when it comes to as side of fruit with oatmeal. a side of fruit for oatmeal should be berries and such, not watermelon and chunks of orange. i don’t know how the hell that happened this morning, but hopefully, chicago, it was a fluke.

mark, if you happen to read this, you have saved the band hours of tedious boredom and we are eternally thankful in spite of the fact that castlevania 2 doesn’t work.

dave is tapping me on the shoulder, which is llc code for “get off the damn kinko’s internet work station.” dave in a rush is up probably the only contender against dave with a few drinks in him for the title of scariest incarnation of dave. he’s like a cornered mountain goat. it’s sublime and poetic to see in the flesh, but poke it with the stick of delay and you will reap the wrath of dave as a mountain goat. dear god i need some sleep.

respek.